Blackberry Pie

 

In the past few years, I have been through a lot and quite honestly, have lost a lot. Some things I willingly gave up and others were taken from me. No matter how it happened, it was painful and hard to overcome.  I know I have lost a lot but I have gained even more.  I understand more of what I want and what I need and am happy to see myself as a more diverse individual. I have rediscovered interests and developed new passions.  

 

In saying that, it does not mean that, at times, I won't mess up in some way.  I make mistakes. I don't trust well. I am self-conscious. I don't always communicate effectively. I can be impatient. And, I just generally have my moments!! Recently, I almost lost someone who is very important to me for all of these reasons. Of course, no relationship is perfect and each person brings their own problems or issues to the party, but now I see some of mine more clearly. I have a tendency to over-analyze and recently, I was just too inside my own head.  This prevented me from seeing the greatness that was right in front of me. Do you ever do that? Well I did!  It is like that old saying, "you can't see the forest for the trees!" I was not seeing the whole picture and I was panicking when little things went wrong. I was asking for one thing and then holding my hands over my eyes when it was happening. I was not allowing people to love me in THEIR WAY! I know a lot of this comes from fear. In the past, when I thought I had my whole life figured out, the bottom fell out and I realized just how hard I can fall. And honestly, I am scared of that again. What I realize now, is that recently, I was falling again. I was falling into bad habits and allowing fear to make my decisions instead of letting things take a more natural course. By following this path, I was allowing things that are very important to me slip away.

 

I know, that deep down, these are all things we know about ourselves but sometimes it takes a great event to really bring it to the forefront. I know now that have some more work to do!  There is another circle of healing that I need to conquer. And I will! I know that I will never be perfect but ever-growing might be a good compromise!

Cranberry Bliss Bars

So what else can we say about this recipe? So many bloggers have made this and shared their ideas, but I had to give it a try. As most people know, this is one of Starbucks' Holiday desserts that people wait all year for! There is good reason for that. Aside from being a sure sign that Christmas is coming, this recipe is just "good stuff." Be warned! It is super sweet ....so you might only want one! In that case, maybe Starbucks is  your best bet, but if you want enough to share, make your own!  It is super easy and unlike Starbucks you will not be paying $4 per bar.

Banana Pudding Cheesecake

This recipe is somewhat symbolic of my life right now. Let's just say that it is BANANAS!! Yes, and not in a good way. This week marks the end of my marriage of 10 years (relationship of 14 years.) It has been a horrible past 3 years and it is coming to an end. I have so many mixed emotions right now and unfortunately everyone else has an idea of how I should feel or act. Some have even suggested that I have a party. Obviously, they have not gone through this process. I am a person who does not give up and the downward spiral of the past few years has made me feel very let down in myself and all things that I believed were good and trustworthy. In my heart, I know that I have tried all that I could possibly have, I loved, I listened, I cared, and I tried so hard, even at times I knew I could never break through. So many of my friends and family have watched my struggle; that is the best word for it, a struggle. I kept hoping and trying that everything could be worked out and it couldn't.  I never considered divorce to be a choice for my life,  but as I have learned all of what I did was not enough to overcome life's obstacles or how people change over the years.  Through all the trying and pain, not only have I lost someone that was the most important person in my life at one time; I have lost myself. And that is a sad place to be. I gave and gave and gave and I lost myself.

This week I have allowed myself to finally mourn this process and yes there have been tears. In so many ways, this is a death of a huge part of my life.  Now I have to move on and find out who the new Rebecca is and unfortunately that will be very difficult. I have so many choices to make right now; personally, professionally and all of them can affect me for years to come. I am moving forward slowly, cautiously and most importantly making every decision for me, something I need to learn how to do again. Please keep me in your prayer and send love in my direction.

XOXO

Rebecca

Crunchy Pecan Blackberry Cobbler





Garden Goodness Part 3

What is better than some blackberries? Now you all know I love some blackberries. And I know.... from feedback that I have gotten from some of my readers, last year's blackberry story made some people cry (see Blackberry Lemon Thyme Jam.) That was not my intention but it does make me feel nice that I can really reach you in that way.

This recipe came up as a way for me to say Thanks. As some of you know, my life has been a little upside down these past few years. And while that crazy is coming to an end soon. I am sure a new crazy is just around the corner- that is life right?? Well as a single girl in a new neighborhood, all alone, I have had some learning to do. Thanks to my Daddy, I am a well rounded girl who needs little help using most tools, changing a tire or doing a whole range of household "typically" male tasks. As great a man as he is, he made sure my little sister and I  knew how to survive without a man. And strange to say but since I have been married I have really appreciated that (ironic, huh?) Now, as I live alone again, I appreciate this learning all over.

Well, I did not make this recipe to say thanks to my Dad. No, I make him a lot of other recipes to show my love (a new one is coming next week. I can't tell yet in case he is tuning in.) There is one thing that I can not do with my Honda Accord- haul things. Lucky for me, I have moved into an older neighborhood that has some really great people in it. You know, the kind that when you move in come down and introduce themselves and give you their name and phone number. Well, these neighbors are awesome. They know I am a single girl and they check on me. They brought me a light to put in my garage, that senses when I am home, they send bones home for my Golden Retriever Charlie and as they say here, they are just "good people." (I love this local saying.) Recently, I went to a local store and got a great deal on a new coffee table. Unfortunately I had no way to get it home. I purchased it with the promise that I would come back for it at a later date. As I was pulling in to my driveway, I saw my neighbors and thought should I ask or not. Uggggg..... I hate to ask!!! But I did and they were more than happy to help. They got in their truck right then with straps and a protective blanket and off we went. I was so happy to have them. They always say "honey, you don't owe us anything. This is just good neighbors helping good neighbors." But what is my saying here at Bonbons and Biscotti- "Love Begins in the Kitchen" and for this single girl a little lost in the world right now it is so good to know that she has someone to count on. So, I got in my kitchen and I baked; adding a ton of appreciation and thanks with every sprinkle of sugar.

Peachy Keen Muffins

Who doesn't love a warm muffin for breakfast? I know that I do. These muffins are so good and really easy! OK. They are not as easy as the dump and mix variety from a box, but for homemade muffins they are pretty easy. At times, we get used to the really sweet artificial fruit tastes. These muffins are not super sweet but have a great, subtle peach flavor. They are the perfect morning muffin with a cup of coffee or hot tea. I made these and took them to work this past week and they were gone fast. Give them a try. I am sure your friends or family will fall in love.

Frozen Peach Pie Filling

 A lot of times, when I am talking to friends, patients or family members about some of my cooking practices, they look at me with surprise and say that they never thought of doing that. This happens a lot when I talk about canning, preserving or freezing. Unfortunately, we are more comfortable going to the local big box grocer and buying frozen fruit or veggies in a can. This time of year, when gardens are offering up their highest yield and farmers markets are bursting with seasonal fruits and veggies in every color, is the time to think about what you will miss in winter and plan ahead. Plenty of our local produce can be canned, frozen or dried for later use. Also when you grow or buy some fruits and veggies you always get a few that are just not pretty. These are great ones to save for recipes like this.

In this recipe, I went to our local produce stand that I frequent weekly. They had a special on a half bushel of peaches for $8 because they were considered too small. I bought it and have eaten them, baked with them and gave some to friends. In the bottom of the basket there are always a few that are bruised or slightly crushed. These are always the perfect peaches to make into pie filling. Of course, fresh peach pie is always a treat during summer months, but imagine in the cold gloomy days of January (when we all need a mood booster) having the ability to bake a fresh peach pie. It is comfort at it's best. First, you have the satisfaction of knowing you made this and it gives you the taste of something that you can look forward to. Prepare now. In January you taste buds and maybe your friends will be thanking you!

Peach and Basil Bliss Cocktail

Welcome to Bonbons and Biscotti "Peach Week!" I am really excited to share some of these recipes with you. Here in South Carolina, peaches are the fruit of summer. They are sweet and fragrant and just beautiful. Since I moved here 14 years ago this October, I have learned how to truly love the peach. In the summer, I frequent the local peach farm which is about 4 miles down the road and buy peaches, blackberries, cantaloupe and all things summer that I do not grow myself. I love going to Fisher's Orchard to get my local produce. When I get there, they have a large section of fruit that is called "soft peaches." AKA- they have seen better days or they are marked up in some way (hail damage usually.)  I love this section. Most times, if I am shopping to bake or mash peaches up in drinks, it really does not matter what they look like. On any given day, in the soft peach section, you can find me and at least 2 other elderly women collecting peaches for our baking. It is always makes for an interesting conversation and some true local baking knowledge. This past week when I went, they had half bushels of these beautiful peaches you see in the pictures half off cause they were judged to be too small for sale. I instantly felt sorry for them.... I was worried they would get a complex due to this judgement. I decided to turn their fate around. I bought them, took them home and turned them into all things wonderful.

Chocolate Chip Cherry Blondies

 

 

Hi Ho Cherry O! These blondies are delish! As we have already established, cherries are my favorite fruit and always make me think of my Grandma Clarke.  When I saw this recipe and the combo of cherries and chocolate, I knew this recipe was for me. And the best thing about it: "It is EASY." I had all the basic ingredients in my cabinet, had just been to the store and was the victim of good product placement; there were huge bags of Bing cherries displayed as soon as I walked in the door. Sucker!! So, one night after work I made these and I have to admit, I ate 3. I know, I know... I have to go to the beach in 1 week... But don't worry, I quickly  had 2 ideas! I wrapped the rest of this batch up and hid them (from myself) to take to work the next day. They were raved over and did not make it past lunch time. And then, the next night I made a fresh batch to freeze for the beach. Evil?? How?? Muhahaha!!!

 

Strawberry Nutella Milkshake

It is hot here in South Carolina today. So what better recipe to celebrate our last day of Strawberry week then with an ice cold Strawberry Nutella Milkshake. Yes, I said Nutella. I am currently sitting on my porch right now sharing this recipe with you while I sip, sip away.

It has been a great week of local produce and favorite recipes. If you just need more strawberries make sure you check out our older strawberry posts: Strawberry Riesling Slushies and
Strawberry Cupcakes with Strawberry Meringue Buttercream.

Strawberry Prosecco Jam

 

 



It is summer and fresh fruit abounds. This allows for one of my favorite activities: jam making. Every year I tackle a new jam recipe or two as well as make my usual favorites like my Bourbon Peach Jam. As I have told you before, ever since my teen years I have been making jams and jellies. 

 

 

 

There is one story I always think of when I make jelly. When I was young, my sister and I would go to have weekend visits with my Gram and Pap. We would do all the things that grandparents and grandkids did together; we played putt putt, ate ice cream, and stayed up later than we are allowed at home. We were spoiled at Gram and Pap's. In the summer, we would sleep on the porch and look at the stars. During other times of the year, we would sleep in the guest bedroom in our little single beds. When we would get all tucked in, my Gram would light a candle and tell us a story. One of my favorite stories that she told was of her Mom, my Noni making jelly. She would start by telling us about how hard Noni worked and what a strong woman she was, then she would begin to talk about the jelly. Noni was making grape jelly and as she was stirring the pot she looked out of the window to see the family cow had gotten out of its fence.  She went out into the yard in such a hurry, she forgot about her jelly. By the time she corralled the cow and got back into the kitchen, the jelly was burned in the bottom of the pot. Back in those times, that was a big loss for a family who was on a very fixed income. I can imagine her disappointment.

 

I am not sure why but I was always so enthralled by this story.  Maybe I saw the grown-up me being like my Noni. Maybe I saw my jelly making days ahead. I am not sure, but that is one story that I never got tired of hearing. Of course, my grandma was a great story teller and kept us hanging on every word.

After her story she would stand up kiss each of us and head downstairs. As she went, she would say "Good Night Mrs. Calabash." And my little sister and I would reply, "wherever you are." To this day my sister and I say this to each other! Although I don't see them everyday, my family is my staple.... wherever any of us are.

Grilled Strawberry Balsamic Brie Sandwich

OMG! This might be the best thing that I have ever made!!

Anyone that knows me knows that I am not a "sandwich kind of girl." I know that sandwiches are portable and convenient to eat almost anywhere, but it is just not my thing. Give me good bread, some cured meat (ie prosciutto or salami) and a little cheese and I am in heaven.  I think one of the reasons that I do not like the common sandwich is because most everyday sandwiches or "sandwich places" use lunch meat / cold cuts / deli meat or whatever you want to call those slivers of fatty sliminess. A slice of deli ham makes my skin crawl in ways that most people can only contribute to creepy crawly things. Can you say fatty, salty, chemical laden and most important of all, did this really come from an animal?

But this sandwich, now this sandwich... I can eat everyday. It has simple ingredients and simple tastes. The sweet strawberries, crusty bread and the creamy, buttery cheese are amazing together. The little tang of balsamic really adds depth and a dynamic to the whole thing. This was the sandwich of my dreams! If Subway would start pumping out something this fresh, I would be the first in line. But instead of holding my breath on that thought, I will make my own strawberry sandwiches. I think I am addicted.....

In this post, I want to pay homage to my Dad who made me this awesome baking board and carved the wooden spoon in the picture. I have toted this board around with me for the past 10 years. It is huge and smooth and perfect for rolling out any dough. It is one of my prized possessions. Remember our motto here at Bonbons and Biscotti- Love Begins In The Kitchen.  I think of this board as a little piece of love I keep with me in my kitchen. It is heart warming to have a little of my family's love around always.

5 Minute Strawberry Cobbler

I have personally declared this Bonbons and Biscotti's Strawberry week. I am sooooo excited!! This weekend I bought a huge basket of strawberries at a local farmer's market and I have been busy in the kitchen. This afternoon after working all morning in my veggie garden I set about the task of making Strawberry Prosecco Jam. I know.... sounds awesome huh? You should have smelled it!!!

After finally cleaning up all my sticky jelly covered pots and utensils, I realized that I had not eaten anything since about 10 am. I quickly remembered this awesome single serving mug of strawberry delight that I had made before and absolutely fell in love with. Yeah.... I know it is dinner time!! Real food?? What is more real than warm strawberry deliciousness all for me. Sometimes we need to celebrate ourselves and everything we accomplished. Here's to Me and a day well spent!!!

Oh... I almost forgot, stay tuned for that Strawberry Prosecco Jam. It is coming soon....

Strawberry Cupcakes with Strawberry Meringue Buttercream

Strawberry Cupcakes with Strawberry Meringue Buttercream

Growing up, Valentine's Day was one of those holidays that I looked forward to. I couldn't wait to trudge through the snow to the old Hill's in Ebensburg to pick out my school Valentine's Day cards. I would look at the pictures and the sayings, always making sure the sentiment was right and the character was cool enough for that year. My sister was there too. She would look and look and then ultimately chose Barbie. She was always so pleased with herself and her choice (even though it was evident from the beginning what she would choose) and that would make us smile.  I carefully chose which student in my class got each Valentine and I never signed my name with a pen or pencil. I had a special Valentine's day stamp: a red stamp of my name "Rebecca" surrounded with little hearts that I happily pressed on the back of each card.

But the best part of Valentine's Day was always waiting for me on the kitchen table!!  It was from my Dad. Every Valentine's Day, my dad would go out of his way to make our day special. No matter what shift he worked, us three girls would walk into the kitchen at some point on Valentine's Day and find roses, little boxes of chocolates and a Valentine's Day card. Of course, my mom's would receive the largest bouquet: a big bundle of red roses sitting in the middle of the table. My sister and I would receive smaller vases of yellow or pink roses.  It was tradition for my Mom to read her card and cry. My Dad is a man of few words and his cards to my Mom (no matter the holiday) always seemed to say the absolute right things. Seeing how happy my Mom was on Valentine's Day getting those flowers from my Dad is one of my best Valentine's memories.  My Mom always take the time to take pictures of all the gifts then we would open chocolates, smell roses and say how beautiful everything was.  A lot of times my Dad was not even around when we received our gifts because he was working night shift and had already left for work while we were at school, but every year, there were our roses.

I am not a big believer in showing love through material means but I know that is not what my Dad was doing. He was letting us know that we were his family: "his girls" and even though he did not say it often, he made it known that  we could always count on him. He reaffirmed that commitment every February 14th. Even though his roses stopped arriving on Valentine's Day after I moved out of the house and started my "real" life,  I still think about those flowers every year and know that he is still there for me. He is one of the strongest people I know, and over the years he has offered me his quiet support and sound advice when "the going has been tough." Maybe it is because he and I are so alike but no one can speak to me in tough times quite like my Dad!! I am thankful everyday to have this strength in my life.

I believe that the little things that people do for each other make the biggest memories and the most meaningful gifts. Make a memory this year with someone you love. Happy Valentine's Day!

White Chocolate, Cranberry, Pecan Bites

I just wanted to share this quick little recipe. I have been getting some questions from followers about what they can take to their Christmas party. This is a great recipe because it is super simple and you only need to know how to use a microwave.  I don't know anyone who can not "nuke" something. Give it a try! Your friends and family will be impressed. I guarantee!

Blackberry Lemon Thyme Jam

Blackberry Lemon Thyme Jam

Every summer when I was a child, as a family we looked forward to blackberry season. Because I lived in a somewhat rural area in Western Pennsylvania, our house was surrounded by wooded and undeveloped areas. This allowed for the perfect environment for wild blackberries to grow. They were not the "monster-size" berries that you find at the grocery store now, they were tiny, sweet purple clusters that mother nature tended all on her own.

My dad was the blackberry pro; spotting them on the side of the road as we drove home from my grandma's house or the grocery store.  Dad is a man of few words. He will talk when needed but he is never a person to "waste words" just to hear himself talk. Us girls always knew when he was thinking and as we would drive, we knew he was making mental notes of location and approximate ripening time for our berry picking.  When that day came and dad declared the berries ready, we would all bundle up in our long sleeve shirts and long pants and head out. Since my sister and I were young, we would pick the berries along the bottom and the perimeter of the berry patch so we did not get "stuck" by the thorns on the bushes. Mom and Dad would always venture more into the middle of the patch and therefore get the largest haul.

One really memorable thing about berry picking for me was the vessel that we brought the berries home in: my dad's miner's bucket. For most miners, the bucket that they use to take their lunch into the mine, is a very special item. It is an item that they carry with them everyday; into a place unlike any other and a scene that most people will never see. Most miners carry the same bucket through their mine career. Those buckets see young, hopeful men just starting out going into the mine, they see hard work, the loss of best friends and in this day and age, business politics, and unfortunate mine closing which include the loss of local jobs that have sustained families for generations.  In most cases, the mine bucket will "retire" or become "laid off" from it's duties at the same time their owner does.

Whenever I used to see my dad's mine bucket come home from a long day's work; dirty, scuffed, and with its reflective stickers, I was instantly proud of my dad. But most important for a miner's kid, that bucket was always a sign that my dad was home! Mining is dangerous and knowing he was home was always comforting and a relief (some of my fellow classmates where not so lucky.) The dirty, empty bucket would then sit on the kitchen floor until we were done eating dinner as a family. After dinner, as my mom scrubbed that bucket to get it ready for the next shift,  I always wondered what the bucket had seen that day!

I think that vessel, my dad's bucket, is one of my family's most valued items. It was present in our everyday life and saw my family in all stages of our lives.  If it could talk, it could tell the story of the mine, my dad's long hours there, me and my sister's childhood and my mom ever present in the kitchen making home life happy. That bucket did not just feed my Dad lunch; it fed our entire family.

And on special days in mid summer, in rural Pennsylvania, that shiny silver bucket would go into the woods empty and come out brimming with dark purple berries....

Grandma Ethel's Fruit Salad

Grandma's Fruit Salad

This is another one of those recipes that I must have on a holiday for it to really be special- my Grandma Ethel's fruit salad. This salad in not hard to make and it is the perfect sweet accompaniment to any dinner.  We  always ate it as a side dish not dessert. It allows for a little bit of sweetness in an otherwise savory meal. As a child, this was the special dish that I waited for on special occasions and one of the main reasons was it's "cherry factor."  I told you I love cherries. My Grandma always knew this and would add just a few extra (a whole jar) for my sister and me.
One of the special memories that I have of my Grandma Ethel was the numerous family dinners that she had for holidays. At her house,she had this huge dining table stuck in this little room. There would be 12 or more people around the table, but once everyone got seated no one could get up or out of the room. We were in there tight.  My sister and I would have special seats; one on either side of Grandma. Everyone would sit, eat and talk; passing the dishes along, person to person, family style. Once everyone got their share, the fruit salad would always end up back in front of my Grandma. She would then proceed to pick cherries out of the remaining salad and give them to my sister and me. Our parents would give us a disapproving look and protest mildly but Grandma always won and so did we!

Bourbon Peach Jam

Jam! What is more reminiscent of summer! I started to make jams and jellys when I was about 15 years old. I thought it would be a great gift to give to friends, my parents and grandparents. My mom was supportive of this effort and while she had some experience, she was not the pro. I began with strawberry jam, then peach. All things went well. But as I have said before I am a self-proclaimed lover of all things cherry. We were at the farmers market and I saw a huge basket of Bing cherries. I thought they would be the best thing for my new jam obsession. We got them and took them home and that weekend I set out to make some fabulous cherry jam. I was so excited so I decided to triple the recipe!!! Big mistake! What I ended up with was amazing cherry flavored syrup. The jam never set up. My mom's first response was to call Grandma Ethel. Grandma quickly told me to never change a jam or jelly recipe. You can make multiple batches but these recipes do not double or triple with great success. I hold that lesson and memory in my head today. This was by far not my last kitchen failure but definitely my first and I will remember it for a long time.